Whether you’ve failed to close a major deal, or you’re overwhelmed by a looming deadline, throwing a pity party won’t help. In fact, feeling sorry for yourself can become downright self-destructive. It makes overcoming adversity difficult – if not impossible – and it keeps you stuck.
Mentally strong people refuse to allow self-pity to sabotage their success. Instead, they use life’s inevitable hardships as a way to grow stronger and become better. Here’s how mentally strong people avoid the self-pity trap:
1. They Face their Feelings
Mentally strong people allow themselves to experience emotions like grief, disappointment, and loneliness head-on. They don’t distract themselves from uncomfortable emotions by questioning whether their problems are fair, or by convincing themselves they’ve suffered more than those around them. They know the best way to deal with discomfort is to just get through it.
2. They Recognize Warning Signs of the Downward Spiral
When you focus on everything that is going wrong in your life, your thoughts become exaggeratedly negative. And those negative thoughts will negatively affect your behavior if you dwell on them. The combination of negative thinking and inactivity fuels further feelings of self-pity. Mentally strong people recognize when they’re at risk of becoming caught in this downward spiral and they take action to prevent themselves from living a pitiful life.
3. They Question Their Perceptions
Our emotional state influences how we perceive reality. When you’re feeling sorry for yourself, you’re likely to focus on the bad things going on in your life, while overlooking the good. Mentally strong people question whether their thoughts represent reality.
They ask themselves questions like, “Is my luck always bad?” or “Is my entire life really ruined?” Asking themselves these types of questions allows them to recognize when their outlook isn’t realistic. This allows them to create a more realistic perception of their situation.
